WHAT’S IN A NAME?
Rank and file, we all must live
As what our parents named us.
However, one wonders what it’d be like
If instead of Phil, you were called Mike,
Or, perhaps, Joe or Gus.
What’s in the name, that makes James Dean
The epitome of ‘cool’?
What if Brad Pitt had been Bernie McKay?
Would he still steal girls’ hearts away,
Or would he mop your school?
Would Michael Jordan still have soared
As Mortimer W. Bing?
I wonder if millions would have swooned
If Douglas Presley cooed and crooned.
Methinks, he’d not be “King.”
Nest time you see the Queen of England
Or Oprah, or someone of equal fame,
Think of her as Bernice Schmeldman
Or maybe she’d be Maybel Feldman.
Oh! How ‘bout Lulu Fannie O’Geldman?
See? What’s in name?.