Friday, February 27, 2009

JUST HELP ME OUT!

JUST HELP ME OUT - Kory Wood

In the gender race, men are behind.
So, our Senate should swiftly combine,
To write up a bill
That effectively will
Force all women to carry large signs.

These signs, flashing, neon, and bright,
Would assist male-kind's woebegone plight,
For each sign would display
What each girl WANTS to say,
And thus, bring each man to the light.

"I'd rather not date you, pin-head."
"That shirt makes you look over-fed."
"I want flowers at work."
"Your best friend's a huge jerk."
"Were you listening to what I just said?"

"Call again, and there'll be a law-suit."
"Your gym bag smells like a Malamute."
"I am NOT in the mood."
"No, Steve, belching is rude."
"I'm just laughing so you'll think I'm cute."

And thus, men would know how to please,
And stop sweating, with shakes in their knees.
Boys would woo, girls would grin.
Men would finally win,
And would skip through their love-lives with ease.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, man, I agree! Girls are lame-sauce!

William Shakespeare said...

Kory, you are just brilliant!

Marilyn Monroe said...

Are you typically free on the weekends?

Spock said...

Fascinating...